I haven't been working for a couple of months now, and the jobs I've got applications out to are just sitting there. Pending.
I would love to spend some of this free time volunteering - especially to get my foot in the door for the career I really do want - and even those "applications" are on hold. Pending.
Sure, I want to have a deep, meaningful relationship - maybe even get married in the near future. But the only one I want to do that with is a bit unreachable right now. So I'm patiently waiting.
I've always been a planner. I've been told I'm good at making things happen. Getting things done. But what do you do when you're not sure what to do next? When you have to wait on someone else before you can take the next steps? I'm not so good at that.
I'm not bored. I've got plenty to keep me occupied. But there's a difference between doing something good, and what's best.
It's slightly frustrating to live life on a library waiting list. Waiting for the book I want to read to be within my grasp.
I'd rather not wait my life away.
Hang in there. If only life could be ON DEMAND like everything else nowadays.
ReplyDelete:) i like lana's comment.
ReplyDeleteand i know it's so difficult. but you're doing a good job at it! keep your chin up. have you read this? i read it a few months ago when i was feeling what your post so beautifully describes and it helped. i can't quite remember what all it says, but a few things stuck out that i still think about.